Traveled Roads

Who am I?
I ask myself
As if I desire the answer.
Diving deeper
I only discover more questions
More darkness
More struggle
The knots are tighter
The air is thicker
I can hear voices
But can find no faces
I am alone
Perhaps this is how it's done?
If you want to find answers
There is only one
         TRUE
           GUIDE
And I know this.
Which is why the daily dose of temptations
Baffles me at times
How is it that I am not stronger?
I seek
Yet I choose wrong---Sometimes...
Is that it?
Is that the teacher?
Pain.
That cannot be the only route.
Although, it is the road I know best.
I've walked it
Driven on it
Fuck, I've crawled on my hands and knees
Begging to Jesus on Pain's Road.
It is my companion
And maybe that is the problem
This is a solo journey.
I've gotten so used to having
Pain
I don't know any other way.

And perhaps that is the point.

Re-routing.
My internal GPS needs re-routed.
Pain's Road is a cul de sac.
Life's Road leads somewhere

So, who am I?
I guess I'm someone who desires more
Knows there's more...

But how?
Where?
Let the journey begin...
Destination: Unknown

...RE-ROUTING...



Experience. Freedom. Love. Now.