give a little

i know i shouldn't be crying.
but somehow these tears
comfort me
in this time
when nothing is certain
and all I want
keeps eluding me.
each gust of the spring wind
reminds me of time.
it's passing quickly
yet things around me still seem
untouched.
i hate these tears
because right now
they're all i have.
i am alone.
maybe i chose this
maybe this is how it's supposed to be.
all the odds stacked
i keep pushing
i want what i want
but things break
if they don't at least
give a little.
maybe i should budge on something
give my eyes a rest...

Yet, I continue to weep
for this moment
for what i cannot create
for what i am about to do
out of fear
and utter delight
a contradiction of the
soul and body
mind in the middle
these tears melt my face
trying to wash away
the confusion
and get down to what's real,
what matters
i want what i want.
what i need
what i need i know i want.
cry myself to sleep.
maybe i'll see the future in my dream.






Experience. Freedom. Love. Now.